[翻譯] 異星獵殺 P.307

清照，我是多麼懂妳。安德想著。妳是名真正的光之子，只可惜妳所見的光芒，完全來自妳的神的故事。妳就像是豬人兄弟，坐在那兒，看著我的繼子死去，就算有能力隨時拯救他，只消走幾步路，給他一些放在不遠處的食物和德斯科拉達抗體藥劑。比起過度相信傳誦而來的故事所引發的沉重罪孽，豬人對於他們導致的謀殺卻沒有任何罪惡感。大部分的人對大部分的故事止於聽聽而已，好讓故事與靈魂深處保持著些許距離。但豬人兄弟－還有妳，清照－你們都活在恐怖的謊言故事之中，如要維持自身，就得相信傳說。我如何能責怪妳希望我們全部死去？妳的心中滿溢著神明的偉大，妳要如何才挪出小小空間，對三支異族的生命產生惻隱之心呢？清照，我是多麼懂妳，而且我希望妳能繼續做妳自己。或許有一天，當妳面對自己行為的後果時，你可能會改變，縱然我對此懷疑。鮮少人能在深信宏大無比的故事後，還能將自己從中抽離。

但妳，王母，妳並沒有被任何故事掌控。除了妳本身的判斷，妳什麼都不信。珍已經告訴我妳的為人，以及妳那驚人的才智，妳不只能在短時間內學習大量新知，還能深深理解妳四周的人們。但妳為什麼無法更有智慧一點？當然妳明白珍不會做出導致道星毀滅的舉動，妳卻為什麼沒有足夠的智慧知道什麼不該說，好讓清照忽略那個事實呢？為什麼妳無法適當少說一些真相，好讓珍的死亡能得以倖免呢？如果有一位殺手，他抽出了他的劍，來到了妳家門口，命令妳告訴他他的無辜的獵物身在何處，妳會告訴他那位犧牲者正蜷縮在妳的門後嗎？還是妳會說謊，把他送走？清照就是那位殺手，而珍正是第一位受害者，在那之後整個路西塔尼亞世界將等著被消滅。為什麼妳非說不可，並且告訴清照她可以多麼容易找到我們，並把我們所有人殺死呢？



Qing-jao, I know you well, thought Ender. You are such a bright one, but the light you see by comes entirely from the stories of your gods. You are like the pequenino brothers who sat and watched my stepson die, able at any time to save him by walking a few dozen steps to fetch his food with its anti-descolada agents; they weren't guilty of murder. Rather they were guilty of too much belief in a story they were told. Most people are able to hold most stories they're told in abeyance, to keep a little distance between the story and their inmost heart. But for these brothers - and for you, Qing-jao - the terrible lie has become the self-story, the tale that you must believe if you are to remain yourself. How can I blame you for wanting us all to die? You are so filled with the largeness of the gods, how can you have compassion for such small concerns as the lives of three species of raman? I know you, Qing-jao, and I expect you to behave no differently from the way you do. Perhaps someday, confronted by the consequences of your own actions, you might change, but I doubt it. Few who are captured by such a powerful story are ever able to win free of it.

But you, Wang-mu, you are owned by no story. You trust nothing but your own judgment. Jane has told me what you are, how phenomenal your mind must be, to learn so many things so quickly, to have such a deep understanding of the people around you. Why couldn't you have been just one bit wiser? Of course you had to realize that Jane could not possibly act in such a way as to cause the destruction of Path - but why couldn't you have been wise enough to say nothing, wise enough to leave Qing-jao ignorant of that fact? Why couldn't you have left just enough of the truth unspoken that Jane's life might have been spared? If a would-be murderer, his sword drawn, had come to your door demanding that you tell him the whereabouts of his innocent prey, would you tell him that his victim cowers behind your door? Or would you lie, and send him on his way? In her confusion, Qing-jao is that killer, and Jane her first victim, with the world of Lusitania waiting to be murdered afterward. Why did you have to speak, and tell her how easily she could find and kill us all?

~~~~~~~~~~~

歐爾森的筆法中我最愛的是他不會醜化一個人。

我不是很喜歡讀一個角色被刻意醜化、標籤化只因為作者對某種類型的人物抱持著偏見，並且把那個偏見放入了故事之中。沒有人會認為自己是正在進行醜陋之事，這種敵對式寫法，除了讓角色扁平虛假外，也往往讓我出戲，並且對那名角色......甚至不重要的雜魚，「中毒」。

西方宗教在亞洲往往是一個被打臉的題材。無論是日本動漫對大多基督教精神的醜化，或是以一種極其平面讓人看了不爽的方式詮釋（純潔的瑪麗亞我看兩集棄番。）；或者物質主義至上的對岸小說，也喜愛打倒某種西方體制的天使和諸神，並且安排一個「討厭」的教主，讓主角打臉教主和他愚蠢與充滿謊言的教義。

並不是說西方小說就不會做打臉宗教題材的故事，這段的前面就是相當精彩的唇槍舌戰，不過因為前面的唇槍舌戰太長了懶得翻，所以只翻譯了結論（掩面），而我很喜歡安德的總結。

歐爾森的厲害之處在於：就算一名角色被打臉，讀的時候卻能一面感到打臉橋段的過癮，另一面卻深深可憐那名角色。打臉和體諒這兩種情緒很難同時出現，更難的是同時有著強烈感受，因為這兩種情緒可以說是處在天秤中的兩端，一方面是毫無同情心只想看對方去死，另一方面卻是理解與愛。

或許一個宗教角色堅持的事情在我的眼中是可笑的，畢竟本人並不是任何宗教的教徒，無神家庭耳濡目染下，潛意識抱持著對一些宗教行為看好戲的心態，尤其閱讀故事中身為「神之聲」的清照時常進行一些認為是神在與她溝通的可笑的儀式性行為時。然而，就算是這樣的角色，歐爾森故事的字裡行間卻能讓我找到那名角色的美麗之處，正因為她有著信仰的光芒。另外，前面還有一段是為了信仰而死的神父，口中高喊著耶穌基督之名，我將回歸神的王座右邊，然後氣絕身亡。我讀起來一面覺得有點微妙，另一面卻景仰著如此信神的他。兩種矛盾情感的交織，甚至後者更令人動容。